Resolution, Revelation, and Rejection

Let's just start off by saying that the number of new year's resolutions I have generated closely rivals the combined total number of my ex-boyfriends, speeding tickets, and poor decisions made while drinking neon-colored shooters. For the record, I had two resolutions last year: graduate with a Masters degree and quit smoking. Done and Done. In an over-zealous attempt to re-arrange my lifestyle choices, improve upon the good and eliminate the bad, I have created quite the lengthy legend of resolutions.

I have included an abridged list (God knows I love a good organized list) to prioritize them:

1.) Be honest and tactful - though I'm a horrible liar, I'm not often open. I'm going to attempt better open communication without the occassional (and hazardous) implosion or explosion. Subsequently, I will try to remain tactful. Instead of, "You're a bitch", perhaps I will try, "I'm not quite fond of you at this particular moment". (HOWEVER, if, in fact, you are a bitch, then I reserve the right to honestly communicate that to your face in the loudest mode possible.)

2.) Remove the word "fine" from my vocabulary. I only use "fine" for two reasons:
a. I am feeling snarky.
OR
b. I really don't feel like you deserve any more of my time than what is spent in utterance of this one syllable (but mostly point A above).

3.) Practice good karma. Kill them with kindness. And, if after all that, you still can't get what you want, a little shameless flirting is not out of the question. ;)

4.) Simplify. Does having three planners make me more organized? No. In fact, it makes me a nut-job when the same appointments are not plugged into all three and may or may not be color-coded in different color schemes depending on locations and written in different colored ink which may or may not signify importance depending on what mood I was in when it was recorded! AHHHHH!!!!

I will spare you dear readers from the rest of the list as it basically follows one general rule: only make poor decisions from which you know the direction home. ;)

I spent the holidays in Ohio surrounded by my friends and family, missing the days when the home life meant that someone else made dinner and your laundry found its way from your floor to the washer and back to your room in some mystical fashion that only your mother could manage for the first 18 years of your life.

During my visit home, I went back to my alma mater. How things have changed. By the looks of the campus, you can now enter undergrad as a 12 year old. I found myself in the corner coffee shop, which I am sad to say was converted from Hippie Haven to Starbucks some years ago - correlating with the iconic meltdown from Kent's birkenstock manta to Ugg bandwagon. I sat near a twosome who were discussing relationships. The pair, one male and one female, were platonic friends (that poor bastard) and were talking about his most recent ex-girlfriend. I basically tuned out, until the following quote was uttered:

"She believes in fate and all that 'one person in the universe'...I believe that I am compatible with several people - this is why we didn't work."

And yes, that is the word-for-word quote as I had written on the back of the coffee receipt which reminds me only of the fact that men are pigs and I spent too much on my Venti drip (with room for cream).

This young 20-something's outlook on relationships had revealed suprising insights on relationship sustainability. I began thinking about compatibility and what makes some couples work, some fail, and others just simply glutton for punishment? (Not the "whips and chains" kind, you S&M freaks.) Does compatibility always equal relationship success? (If you've ever taken a standardized test you might note that the use of "always" should tip you off to the answer being "false".) Does success always mean you are compatible? (+ 2 points for those that noted the second usage of "always") What if you were compatible, but not successful? Does this warrant a "re-do"? I was spinning my wheels like a Texan driver on ice, but I think I was on to something...(or I should have stuck with the Tall -sized serving of caffeine, in lieu of the extra 8oz of bittersweet acid)

Before the clock could toll the warning sounds of the impending new year, I sent off a letter like none I had sent before. I asked forgiveness, and patience, but mostly for him back. I got a response within the next day. In a delicate and eloquent way, for the first time in a long time, I was rejected.

So dear readers, I start my year off at my most humblest. I don't know what this year might entail, but I'm the second-most optimisitic person in D.C. next to Harry Reid. I'm ready to get started on these resolutions and to find someone seemingly compatible (or pay them to act as such).

Happy New Year's Dear Readers!

XoXoXO

Kat-(Ben & Jerry are my best friends now)-mandu